really nothing nicer than someone saying “saw this and thought of you”
one time i got a sample from the tea store at the mall and as i walked away the guy said “tea you later” and then his coworker smacked him
what did the mama pig give her baby pig for its rash?
pigs are commonly known for rolling around in dirt, but there’s a reason for this. Pigs skin is very sensitive, the harshness of their environment can result in rashes and often sunburns. Pigs use mud to help relieve pain and protect their skin. Since piglets are even more delicate, mother pigs will often roll their pigs in mud right after birth.
NO THEY GIVE THEM OINKMENT
when a friend buys u food and says u dont have to pay them back u know they are forever
- Me with no money: I want everything
- Me with money: what the fuck do I buy
talking to people you want to be friend with more like
how to play a racing game
- HIT EVERYONE OUT OF THE WAY
- GO FAST
- NEVER USE BRAKES
i get so mad when rich people have awful tastes in clothes, like please take advantage of your wealth
i was thinking earlier “why isn’t there an adult version of an easy bake oven” but then i realized
it’s just an oven
imagine if it was morning and the birds were chirping and you went outside and they all got silent and looked at you like they were just talking about you
“My name is Bond. James Bond.”
“My name is Dumbledore.
Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.
Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.
Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.”
“My name is Ramirez.
de la Rosa Ramirez.
Montoya de la Rosa Ramirez.
Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramirez.
Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramirez.
Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramirez.”